Saturday, December 24, 2011

Sky River Raspberry Honey Wine

Naked Wine Review 88
Wine: Sky River Raspberry Honey Wine (Mead)
Producer: The Sky River Meadery
Vintage: I don't know, they won't tell me
Region: USA>Washington State>Sultan
Price: 14.00
Date tasted: 12/23/11
Place tasted: During a fallow moment, mid stride of one of the more special blossoms in my life's bouquet. As I faded out, and then faded back in again, I thought to myself, 'I have the most brilliant, talented, and funny family ever. How did I get so lucky?' I also thought, 'damn, this is really good mead!'
Serve with: Smoked salmon & brie snacks would mate well with her. She would also be fantastic with cheese cake or any rich desert that cries out for fruit. 
Appearance: Bright honey sunshine through dense raspberry red.
On the snoot: is the soft passionate breath of fresh naked raspberries.
Taste: Raspberries packed in honey. Bright to mellow and back again. It's like listening to the Echos' side of Pink Floyd's Meddle album. 
Balance: Sweet, but not sticky; a bright raspberry force combines with the inner strength of alcohol and pulls her into perfect balance. 
Comments: You know how scents are a huge memory trigger? Well it seems raspberry memories will always make you smile. Sip slowly, savor her charms, and go someplace nice in your past. I think you already did. 
I can't help but think of a lyric from the great and powerful, Fiona Apple...slow like honey, heavy with mood.
Rating: 4 glowing tipsys

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Marina Piper Pinot Noir 08'

Naked Wine Review 87
Wine: Marina Piper Pinot Noir 
Producer: Cottonwood Winery
Vintage: 08'
Region: Oregon
Price: 16.00
Date tasted: 12/09/11
Place tasted: I had traveled six hundred miles to join my original clan who live near the north pole. The air was crisp and clean where the snow sparkled like cocaine under a full moon. There was a river edged with icy lace and the magical ability to erase any unnecessary thoughts that may otherwise have obfuscated the clarity of the moment. Happy to enjoy the simple pleasure of a glass of wine in the the warm comfort of fire, family, and food.
Serve with: Salmon and other seafood or mildly prepared beef, pork, and bird would all be good to match with this wine. Mushroom dishes and sweet veggies would be ideal as well. I had it with lemon pasta and seared scallops, yummy!
Appearance: Glowing ruby, infused with brilliant winter light.
On the snoot: Rose and lavender embrace and share their deepest secrets with all the comfort and trust of life long friends.
Taste: Strawberry softly muted with star annis and vanilla bean expands quickly along the palate like a riptide of vinum virtute. A solid structure lifts and suspends the senses in a perfect fruit, mineral, and earth heaven before exhaling into the finish, where she leaves behind a beach of lingering soft floral delights. 
Balance: Light bodied with lots of character. No sweet, no bite. Tannins are feathery and understated. 
Comments: 'This wine was recorded through a fly's ear; and you have to have a fly's eye to see it'....(altered from Captain Beefheart: Trout Mask Replica, a W.W. favorite!) 
Let her breath for at least an hour before imbibing. There is a naked classical ballerina earth spirit dancing in that bottle. Try it, you'll see. 
Rating: 3.8 tipsys, excellent value

Friday, November 11, 2011

Columbia Winery Merlot 07'

Naked Wine Review 86
Wine: Mostly Merlot (85%)
Producer: Columbia Winery
Vintage: 07'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: Average price 13.00 (7.99 at Washington State Liquor Store)
Date tasted: 11/09/11
Place tasted: I was standing still in the long and loving embrace of rain. A beautiful mineral perfume hung heavy in the enchanted fogy air, while joyful music echoed on my windows. Her naked toes tapping out ancient healing mantra; a most glorious dance that by divine nature cleanses and revitalizes a tired, longing soul. A beautiful moment shared with a glass of fine merlot. 
Serve with: It says on the bottle to try with eggplant parmesan, so that's what I did. Wonderful!
It would also pair well with grilled red meats, strong cheeses, and dark chocolate.
Appearance: A clear and glowing deep Bing Cherry red.
On the snoot: are subtle wafts of cranberry and vanilla incense.
Taste: Tastefully understated cherry notes with moist tobacco, carmel, and a hint of cocoa bean. Softly rounded triangular tannins copulate and multiply with smoky oak on the warm bed of your grateful palate as it moves into a blissfully lingering finish. 
Balance: Well balanced and quite sturdy in all four elements of sugar, acid, tannin, and alcohol.  
Comments: A sexy, masculine, and eloquent wine that seems to bring on spontaneous visualizations of Aidan Quinn. Go figure. It will bring a smile to your lips as your sip and ponder away on a lovely, rainy evening. Life is good.
Rating: 3.7 tipsys
excellent value

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Pendulum Red Blend 08'

Naked Wine Review 85
Wine: Red Blend>Merlot, Syrah, Cabernet, Barbera, Sangiovese, Cab Franc, Petite Verdot, & Malbec
Producer: Pendulum
Vintage: 08'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: 15.00
Date tasted: 10/23/11
Place tasted: After honoring the presence of the one and only red tree in a sea of otherwise lemon colored leaves at Golden Gardens Park, I wandered down to the Puget Sound and played with the tide as she tried to touch my shoes back and forth, again and again. I then went to see Martin and we shared a bottle of this beautifully sculpted wine and talked about the purpose of laughter. A perfect day in a perfect city. There's no place like home.
Serve with: Expensive dark chocolate laced with fruit really brings out her inner beauty. I mean it, spend the money. Cheap stuff will offend the palate's IQ and give you zits. Don't go there. Posh; Frans; Chocolove; Lopez Winery's malbec truffles....mmmm. Go THERE!
Appearance: of a most beautiful garnet light, mingling with purple reflections.
On the snoot: An aromatic bouquet of mixed berry and cocoa beans balanced with soft mineral, licorice spice, and just a hint of lotus flower is presented lovingly to the cute, smitten little snoot. 
Taste: Forward on the palate are raspberry and black current mingling with cocoa and peppercorn. Mineral and wet meadow are present as well. Heavy, chewy tannins pull the finish into a long delightful journey through a sandy Persian desert until it flows into a sort of wet crystal pool of perceived oasis.
Balance: She is Garudasana in a bottle; balanced, focused, and clear as any bird of prey.
Comments: If you take a ride on this wine, she will take you through a vast spectrum of terrain; from berry patch, to spice land, to grassy meadow, across the desert, and into the wet lands. She's all that. 
The clock ticks and the Pendulum swings. It was a great ride, and I wanna go again....for lifetimes.
Rating: 4 tipsys

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Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Debauchery Carmenere 08'

Naked Wine Review 84
Wine: Debauchery Carmenere
Producer: Vina Fray Leon S.A. for the Gerard Wine Co.
Vintage: 08'
Region: Chile>Maipo Valley
Price: 13.00
Date tasted: 10/02/11
Place tasted: I think the sun was coming up; or was it going down? The clocks had all stopped and all I remember is there was a cat curled up in the corner of an otherwise empty room. I was sitting on the floor visiting with someone I had just met a moment ago, but had actually known for quite a long time. He shared many a story about the naked cowboys who roamed China in the late sixteen hundreds. Fascinating! 
Serve with: Quinoa with black beans and cilantro. Can handle a fair amount of spice. Would be great with stilton or other strong aged cheeses, or maybe some nice dark posh chocolate
Appearance: She enters your glass wearing a stunning crimson gown with a gentle ruby glow around the trim. 
On the snoot: are chocolate candy corns in a soft leather pouch with a smudging of nag champa.
Taste: She introduces herself with a sexy whisky, yet smooth voice that holds your attention with a mouthful of ripe berries, black current, tobacco, and cracked pepper echoing in the timbre. Finishes with the big 'O'; strong and lasting with special effects of soft elegant tannins on oak, vanilla, and vintage leather. 
Balance: HWP with slow thick sturdy legs that wrap around the inside of your happy glass. 
Comments: You need to get some of this; and I need to get more. She's a perfect ten.  I can't imagine anyone not loving this wine. If you are lucky enough to land on Orcas Island, you can pick it up at Country Corner Cellars. Just try to leave a bottle or two for me, ok?
Rating: 4 tipsys

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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Chateau Ste Michelle
Cabernet 08'

Naked Wine Review 83
Wine: Cabernet
Producer: Chateau Ste. Michelle 
Vintage: 08'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: 11.50  
Date tasted: 9/26/11
Place tasted: My soul was perched high on a golden sphere like an eagle; eyes sharp and focused on a multitude of shiny goals. My body lie injured on the rocks below, broken and in pain; my mind, both ally and enemy living in isolation behind my eyes. I surrendered my entire bank account to a triad of all consuming flames with complete faith that the will of the divine would send healing, truth, and purpose into my fully integrated being. Then I had a glass of cabernet. Actually, I had two glasses. 
Serve with: Red meat; dark chocolate; pasta dishes; medium to strong cheeses; zucchini casserole pie. 
Appearance: Black onyx with a muted garnet glow on.
On the snoot: The familiar scent of a dark chocolate covered cherry pixy soaking in a healing mineral bath.
Taste: Forward on the palate are dense ripe lambert cherry kittens who mingle with cocoa faced bunnies. In the perfect world inside my glass they go prancing through a grassy meadow waving celery stick wands and caramelizing everything they touch. Tannins soft and subtle contribute to a long but simple and elegant matte finish. 
Balance: She is perfectly poised and graceful, with delightfully Rubenesque full body.
Comments: "Hey there little fruit fly, GET THE HELL OUT OF MY CAB!!" Ah, the beauty and trials of Autumn. Time flies like the wind; fruit flies like your wine.
Rating: 4 tipsys

Monday, September 12, 2011

Hyatt Vineyards Merlot 05'

Naked Wine Review 82
Wine: Merlot
Producer: Hyatt Vineyards
Vintage: 05'
Region: Washington>Yakima Valley
Price: 6.00 
Date tasted: 09/11/11
Place tasted: I was tired from chasing lazer bugs around all day on the powdery surface of a glowing harvest moon. So I brushed myself off and then sat back down on the Earth to rest. When I looked up, my attention fell liquid into a mirror of starry light shining in twinkles and orbs above me. I suddenly felt very much at home in my body; and on my rock.
It was a distinct pleasure to share this wine with that moment. 
Serve with: Italian Roasted Veggies along side pasta and pesto with parmesan. It would also go nicely with steak, pork chops, or lamb.
Appearance: Vintage dark amber light over glowing 70's garnet colored lava.
On the snoot: A pheromonic raspberry and licorice spice perfume.
Taste: Rich black cherry and cracked pepper served on the old spare wheel from a classic Bentley S2. Sexy soft tannins with naked curves lovingly embrace the palate then mellow into a delightfuly dry and satisfying finish. A wine of true aesthetic, esthetic, and blissthetic nature. 
Balance: She's a lovely elegant lady and a well toned athlete as well. Low on sugar with just enough acid to send you on a safe and happy trip.
Comments: You can relax and delight in her experience, confidence, and uniquely manicured character. If Merlots have been disappointing you lately, get yourself a bottle of this and renew your faith in the grape!   
Rating: 3.5 tipsys 
excellent value

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Chateau Ste. Michelle
Dry Riesling 10'

Naked Wine Review 81
Wine: Dry Riesling
Producer: Chateau Ste. Michelle
Vintage: 10'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: 9.00 
Date tasted: 8/31/11
Place tasted: I was sitting heavy on a cloud; listening to the sweet moanings of Jolie Holland and becoming lighter by the moment. As the eyes of the sun slowly closed on the day, a gentle peace washed over my tired being....sip, sip, sip. 
Serve with: It would be delightful with all manner of Asian food. It's one of those rare wines that complements East Indian cousine beautifully as well.
I was lucky enough to run across a Thai Beef Curry Bento Box in my travels (actually I was tipped of to that). They were perfect together!
Appearance: is that of a Champagne diamond set in white gold with Peridot accents.
On the snoot: Soft pear with notes of gentle jasmine that ring high and true.
Taste: Delicate pear with a hint of something tropical combine with key lime to form a beautifully radiant disposition. Full with bright green fruit that is crisp and refreshing. Finish is soft and satisfying. 
Balance: Not a flaw on her naked body; just perfect. Bright without bite. Is she a ballroom dancer? figure skater? Maybe both.
Comments: This is a very happy wine. She will lift your spirits and cleanse your aura of all negativity. She is infused with all of the tolerance and gratitude necessary to get you through 'the ninety days of august'...smiling :)
Rating: 4 tipsys for sure
(of course, she graduated from Chateau Ste. Michelle's finishing school)

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Sunday, August 28, 2011

Alamos Malbec 10'

Naked Wine Review 80
Wine: Malbec
Producer: Alamos
Vintage: 10'
Region: Argentina>Mendoza
Price: 12.00
Date tasted: 8/23/11
Place tasted: I had been kidnapped by monsters for three very long days. I was tortured, beaten, and brutalized. Thankfully on the third day I escaped and hid in what some would refer to as 'housekeeping quarters', whatever. Back home in what is actually a splendid little palace I opened a bottle of this beautiful glowing nectar and relaxed in a hot tub of epsom salts; chanting in Hindu and sipping in gratitude until all the 'happy' infused back into my being. I have never met a monster that could not be defeated. Durga Ma! May all beings everywhere be happy and free. 
Serve with: I enjoyed it with stuffed zucchini. With it's fruit forward impact and soft dry finish, it would pair well with all manor of quality beef, lamb, duck, or heavily herbed pasta dishes.
Appearance: Soft violet mumbles combine with dense black cherry and twinkle in the eye of the beholder. 
On the snoot: A brilliant powerful aroma of rich berry, celery, and sandy ocean beaches. 
Taste: Black cherry and dark berry combine on impact then give way to an etherial layer of spice and earth. Subtle tannin that gets bigger as you chew interacts with oak for a lingering, and intensely satisfying dry finish.
Balance: Nicely balanced. Full red lips, defined cheek bones, and sinewy luscious naked body. 
Comments: A fine bottle of wine with many redeeming qualities that speak well for her. Let breath for at least an hour before imbibing. Then enjoy and embrace the goodness in this, the one and only moment.  
Rating: 3.5 Tipsys

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Saturday, August 13, 2011

William Knuttel Sonoma County Cabernet 08'

Naked Wine Review 79
Wine: Cabernet, blended with Malbec, Merlot, and Petit Verdot
Producer: William Knuttel
Vintage: 08'
Region: California>Sonoma County
Price: 22.00
Date tasted: 7/22/11
Place tasted: I'm trying to recall all the lovely wholesome details of the visit at the beginning of my journey a few weeks ago when this wine was so joyfully imbibed, but I can't concentrate over the cast and crew hanging out in the hotel room above me who right now this very minute are in the process of producing the most incredible porn movie EVER MADE! How weird is your August getting?
Serve with: Cher's Pesto & Sausage Lasagna
Appearance: Deep glowing purple over garnet.
On the snoot: a dark smoky bouquet with notes of cherry, and maybe just a little coriander.
Taste: Plum, cracked pepper, and anise lay down the foundation. Fine grain tannins provide a smooth ride through a lingering soft petal finish. Very nice.
Balance: Nicely balanced; sugar and acid share center stage while a gentle tannin and alcohol rhythm section cater to her lovely melody.
Comments: You could be sitting naked in the back of your car with a classy paper coffee cup full of Cabernet and your little Mac Book making stuff up that you kinda wish would happen during a three hour ferry line wait to return to your blessed island home. Maybe you'd rather be enjoying a wonderful lasagna dinner with friends and family, or just relaxing in your little cabin up in the middle of nowhere. Wherever you end up and whatever you feel like doing, this wine will go well with it. It's just a good solid anytime anywhere wine. So drink, enjoy, and be happy and free. 

Rating: 3.4 tipsys 

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Rook Cabernet Merlot Syrah 08'

Naked Wine Review 78
Wine: Cabernet 15%, Merlot 45%, Syrah 40%
Producer: Corvade Wine Co.
Vintage: 08'
Region: Washington>Columbia Valley
Price: 8.99 at Country Corner Cellars on Orcas Island.
Date tasted: 07/29/11
Place tasted: I was in an art gallery I used to frequent but had not been to for six long years. The naked beauty in all of the paintings and sculptures moved me to tears, laughter, and deep silent contemplation; just as they did in times gone by. The most beautiful piece of art in the gallery was a gracefully animated creature who sang to me a delightful melody. She was all dressed up in a tortoiseshell hair suit with a sleek and elegant tail fixture attached at the end.
Serve with: Appetizers of bleu and other strong cheeses would be great. Follow up with red meat and hearty strong 'manly' main dishes, and dark posh chocolate deserts.
Appearance: A kind of mystical and opaque deep black purple. Not a lot of refracted light coming through. Who needs all that light anyway? Darkness unifies, while light separates.
On the snoot: is a dynamic trio of old leather, pepper, and plum.
Taste: Embraces the palate hard on impact with rich black current, and dark chocolate love. Masculine in nature with chewy tannins that linger and smolder in an exquisitely lasting dry pepper & oak finish. Just a beautiful thing.
Balance: Bursting with virility, as if endowed with way too much of everything in equal portions of sugar, acid, tannin, and alcohol, his shamelessly hedonistic nature abides, which I so love in a man...I mean a wine.
Comments: Were he a guy, he would pack a pistol and have cigarettes that he never smoked stashed in his cowboy boots. He would also be charming, kind, and super buff from lifestyle, not vanity. 'The gym is for posers and wimps.' Those are his words, not mine. I love the gym.

Rating: I give it 4 hard tipsys; an excellent value.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Red Bicyclette Pinot Noir 09'

Naked Wine Review 77
Wine: Pinot Noir
Producer: Red Bicyclette
Vintage: 09'
Region: California
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 6/27/11
Place tasted: It was a lovely late evening limousine ride down Aurora Borealis Blvd. in the good company of a dear friend whom I am lucky and blessed to call my sister. 
Serve with: Stilton Burger ala Wine Witch & JoJo Potatoes. In general, keep your food flavors on the light side so not to overpower the delicate subtleties of Pinot Noir. It would be good with Salmon, Duck, Burgers; but NOT Salmon duck burgers. That's just not right. Light sauces incorporating basil, mushrooms, or lavender would be perfectly acceptable with Pinot Noir.
Appearance: A very clear light cherry red, sitting pretty in your glass.
On the snoot: is a faint and etherial wild rose and cherry blossom.
Taste:  She opens up to you with an enchanting floral breath that gently guides you down a path leading to Dionysus's own secret
orchard. Lingering notes of brilliant cherry and soft vanilla mingle and dance around the happy palate then move with ease into a light and elegant finish. 
Balance: She is svelte as Bhujanga with a magical naked body that transcends balance and goes straight into levitation. 
Comments: From grape to finish, a fine wine is an excellent example of how to live a good life. Each with its own unique qualities and beauty which peaks in character with maturity. The bottle is opened; it breathes; it is shared and becomes a beautiful lasting memory. It was always a good life, from grape to finish.
Rating: 3.4 tipsys

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Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Cooper Hill Pinot Gris 09'

Naked Wine Review 76
Wine: Cooper Hill Pinot Gris
Producer: Cooper Mountain Vineyards
Vintage: 09'
Region: Oregon>Beaverton 
Price: 14.00
Date tasted: 6/2/11
Place tasted: Bob and I were trying to tune the piano he keeps at his summer home looking out over the Bay of Lemuria. We could not agree on the Railsback Curve in the upper register so we decided we'd just call in a professional tomorrow. What a great opportunity to share a nice bottle of wine, a delightful meal, and that amazing view! It was much more fun than the Railsback Curve, no matter how fast you take it.
Serve with: Appetizers such as Brie on water crackers topped with rose hip butter, gala apples, nectarines, pears, dried cranberries, pecans, smoked salmon, and any fruits, cheeses, and meats subtle in character.
For a main course try the Lavender Salmon recipe. It's a beautiful thing. Just don't throw a lot of challenging spices or foods that overpower the palate at her or you will compromise her lovely subtle charms.
Appearance: She sparkles in your glass like a Champagne Diamond. 
On the snoot: Soft etherial lilly of the valley and citrus combine and seem to actually bless the thousand spoked crown of your head as you inhale. That's the effect it had on me anyway. 
Taste: Opening notes of grapefruit and arugula dance lightly in a summer pear tree. Mid palate gives way to dense citrus drizzled with honey leading into a gentle, clean finish. 
Balance: She sports a light to medium and fairly athletic naked body. Between acids and sugars, there is no short straw. Very well balanced.
Comments: Oregon does Pinot extremely well. I'm looking forward to trying the Cooper Hill Pinot Noir soon. You should probably go get yourself a bottle of this and celebrate a warm summer evening with a gentle moonlit picnic. 
When the sun closes his eyes and allows the moon to rise, I walk alone a path all my own in freedom and in peace.
Blessed be the nightcrawlers, for the path with a heart sometimes shines brightest in moonlight. 
Rating: 3.7 tipsys

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Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Vega Oliveras Tempranillo
Vino de la Tierra 09'

Naked Wine Review 75
Wine: Tempranillo>Vino de la Tierra 
Producer: Vega Oliveras
Vintage: 09'
Region: Spain>Castilla La Mancha
Price: 12.00
Date tasted: 3/16/11
Place tasted: I was happily reconnecting with my frined, Kapinjala, a bird that lives on raindrops.
Making merry with she and her handsome flock, we sang with cheese, danced with children, and drank fine wine into the evening. A sparkling bonfire captured what was left of our energy invoking peaceful smiles. We always celebrate the good things in life, because that's how we roll. 
Serve with: Among other wonderful things were 'No Woman' and 'Flagship' Cheese by Beecher's Handmade Cheese. The homemade caraway-sage bread was delightful.
Appearance: Meaty strong naked legs saunter slowly down the sides of your glass. Cher says it has a Lavender shimmer and I agree. A lavender shimmer floating atop rich thick purple blood. It's enough to make your inner vampire drool.
On the snoot: Clean and snappy cherry surrounded by an aura of oakiness.
Taste: A dark melodrama of fruit on impact mellowing into a more defined formation of plum and spice, dusted with vanilla. It's really more spice and wet forest than fruit though. Oak and fine, earthy tannin embrace the palate on the finish which lasts about the length of a perfect goodnight kiss. 
Balance: Nice structure. Light and free but still connected to the Earth. Sort of like a kite for the palate to play with.
Comments: This review was composed over two months ago. I remember like it was yesterday. It's been a very magical couple of months, but oh how I miss my Kaya Katwoman =^..^=  I will call and sing your song to you as often as I can until we are reunited, my dear dear friend. Kaya Kaya, for the rain is falling....
Rating: 3.4 tipsys

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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Colonia las Liebres Bonarda 09'

Naked Wine Review 74
Wine: Colonia las Liebres Bonarda
Producer: Altos las Hormigas
Vintage: 09'
Region: Argentina> Mendoza
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 5/13/11
Place tasted: In the eye of a rainbow hurricane. That quiet peaceful moment when the world stands still just long enough to catch your breath and give it some quality time. Breathing is great. Colonia las Liebres is great as well. It means Colony of Rabbits. 
Serve with: Argentinian Pot Roast. Actually it would be marvelous with any red meat or tomato based pasta dish.
Appearance: Dense garnet with extreme purple refractions. She's a smooth and charming wine with highly viscous legs that cling to the sides of your glass like a Nattie to a Chuck. 
On the snoot: I pretty much just picked up strawberry, some strawberry, and maybe just a little strawberry. 
Taste: This lovely vino caresses and sings to the receptive naked palate in juicy notes of mixed berry and cracked pepper, with just a hint of cardamom on the exhale. Yummy stuff. Upon finishing she curls up in a warm blanket of silky tannins and fades from your awareness like watercolor rain into a beautiful dream. 
Balance: Very well balanced, in fact, she has such incredible balancing skills, I once saw her roller skating on the branch of a Madrone tree while it was swaying in a wind storm outside my bedroom window. Amazing! You should have been there.   
Comments: She's a test tube baby, no wood involved. Sip and enjoy the unoaked pure expression of the Bonarda grape. If you find yourself on Orcas Island, you can locate this stuff at Country Corner Cellars.
This review is in honor of my sisters birthday.
A toast: You are a kind and gentle blessing to everyone lucky enough to know you. May You live forever and I never die
Happy Birthday Molly
cin cin.
Rating: 3.7 stars

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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Excelsior Cabernet 07'

Naked Wine Review 73
Wine: Cabernet 
Producer: Excelsior
Vintage: 07'
Region: South Africa
Price: 8.00
Date tasted: 3/15/11, 'Beware the Ides of March'
Place tasted: I was at a military parade on Mars, in the company of a very large crowd of, shall we call them, people. Raised up high in the clutches of their right hands were rainbow colored fire sticks. In my right hand, held close to my heart, was a glass of Excelsior Cabernet. In the crowd, but not of the crowd.  Where else would I be?
Serve with: Would go nicely with a summer barbecue featuring any quality meats of the red variety. 
Appearance: A crystal clear deep plum purple.
On the snoot: Imagine standing next to someone who is eating a grape popsicle in a vintage guitar shop which also carries a variety of fine tobacco products. I find it a very comforting snoot.
Taste: Bursting with plum, then tastefully followed by hints of tobacco and licorice spice wafting around an etherial naked beach. Finishes a little quickly but on a kind and gentle note. Like a lovers full wet kiss before escaping through an open window, thus maintaining discretion.
Balance: This wine has the legs of Betty Grable, however, her lack of tannins and acid dub her a little uninteresting to the Wine Witch. 
Comments: People who don't like red wine, would probably like this one; for that matter so would people who do. It's a nurturing, gentle spirited, proper lady of a wine.
The snoot invoked the memory of a place that is no longer in my birth town called 'the Guitar Shop Winery', where I first learned to play the guitar AND where I first learned how to make wine...and boy, did I ever have some beginners luck! I wish you could have been there, but you probably weren't even born yet, you cheeky bastard. So I'll offer up a toast to Tom & Abby, wherever they are. May they be happy and free.
Rating: 3.4 stars

Monday, May 2, 2011

Dr. Wolfe's Family Red 08'

Naked Wine Review 72
Wine: Dr. Wolfe's Family Red
Primitivo, Lemberger, Syrah, Petite Syrah, and Cabernet Sauvignon
Producer: Thurston Wolfe
Vintage: 08'
Region: Washington State
Price: 16.00
Date tasted: 4/22/11 
Place tasted: It was late at night and the waves were lapping against the shore below me. I had the window open so I could listen to Mother Earth singing outside. I often sing to her at night, but tonight, I was to be her captive audience. The night sky twinkled behind her, and as she sang....Samadhi.
Samakhi: It has been described as a non-dualistic state of consciousness in which the consciousness of the experiencing subject becomes one with the experienced object.
Serve with: Anything. It would be good with pretty much anything. It was great with various fruits, cheeses, and Posh Chocolate Truffles
Appearance: A garnet, glowing and shining its light through rich dense flowing blood; much like a soul that sparkles within a body.
On the snoot: are powerful hits of cherry soaked in fine Mexican Vanilla then blessed by Druid Priests under magical moonlight; that's that little extra somethin' somtehin' that gives you a 'lift' as you inhale. Go ahead, everyone's doing it.
Taste: Upon taking the stage she greets you with tones of deep black cherry, licorice spice, and warm etherial tar and oak. Midway through her performance the experience moves into a solid soprano fruit and vanilla crescendo that cascades over the captive palate. Smooth, subtle, and somewhat toasted tannins linger long and steady on a soft yet beautifully controlled finish. The perfect performance of this lovely wine demands an encore.
Balance: She has beautiful meaty legs that wrap themselves around the inside of your glass like silk stockings on an angel. The balance of tannin, acid, sugar, and alcohol form an impressive quartet.
Comments: From snoot to finish, she is wonderfully dynamic. There is a naked Diva hiding in that bottle just waiting to take her first breath. You should go buy some and let her out. I did, and I will again. I get mine from Country Corner Cellars, Eastsound WA on Orcas Island.
"If you're not here, you're somewhere else."
Happy Birthday, Earth Day, Mothers Day, Spring!

Rating: 3.8 stars

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Nobilo Sauvignon Blanc 10'

Naked Wine Review 71
Wine: Sauvignon Blanc
Producer: Nobilo >Regional Collection
Vintage: 10'
Region: New Zealand >Marlborough
Price: $11
Date tasted: 4/9/11; and then again on 4/15/11. 
Place tasted: There was a moon, an island, and singing. I think we were sirens; channeling ancient song to soothe and quiet the restless spirits of mariners, lured to their doom in the days of superstitious demise. I think that's what happened. I'm a little fuzzy on the details, but then being on the moon is like that sometimes. At any rate, the joy derived from sipping this delightfully inspired nectar certainly does shine clearly.
Serve with: chicken, fish, light pasta dishes or salad, brie & fresh fruit, and things of that nature. It's a great summer picnic wine.It's a great wine anyway.
Appearance: of clear golden light with slight peridot reflections.
Greets the snoot: with floral tropical breezes, invoking memories of sandy beaches and sunshine. There are hints of citrus mingling with pineapple, subtle mango, and is that kiwi that I detect? It's nice.
Taste: Subtle floral notes floating on brilliant citrus fruit intense enough to awaken your slumbering palate to thoughts of a lush green meadow with all the urgent passion of a naked lovers afternoon kiss. Soft banana and tropical undertones give it a mellow anchor to bring balance to it's bright and sunny disposition. A slow and gentle finish that giggles, coos, and begs for more. She possesses no edgy bite, or metallic aftertaste that a white wine of lesser character might have. No regrets here; just a really good time.
Balance: Beautifully balanced with a light but solid body and all the confidence and poise of a classical ballerina. 
Comments: I would call her a very joyful wine. Having no medical license, I certainly cannot recommend it as an aid to clearing the obfuscation of a down day. I can however tell you that for this wine witch, she is a total pick-me-up. Hell she may even be a make-me-fly. Kind of like a broomstick in a bottle. 
Rating: 4 stars > excellent value

NOTE: If you are in the area, you can find it at Island Market, 469 Market Street, Eastsound, WA
on Orcas-Gem of the San Juan Islands

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Sunday, April 3, 2011

Baron de Barbon Reserva Rioja 04'

Naked Wine Review 70
Wine: Baron de Barbon Reserva Rioja
Variety: Tempranillo
Producer: Bodegas Muriel
Vintage: 04' 
Region: Spain> La Rioja
Price: 21.00
Date tasted: 3/16/11
Place tasted: Stylin' and smilin' at the Chateau Cherlin & Kyle; located at the corner of Heaven and Childs Laughter Lane. 
Served with: Perfectly barbecued Lamb and Elk Steak; an excellent pairing. It's quite a bold wine so goes well with red meats and strong cheeses such as No Woman & Flagship(go to: Beecher's), Cabrales Bleu, Stilton, and things of that nature. I'm getting hungry now; how about you?
Appearance: Gaze into the eyes of Dionysus and experience that rich burnt garnet twinkle with a deep intimate tawny glow.
On the snoot: Pungent and intoxicating burst of testosterone with a sort of smoky tobacco essence. Carries romantic snoot memories of strolling with your best friend through an enchanted forest, holding hands and snacking on cherries. 
Taste: A rich and charming wine with toasted tar soaked cherry and a kind of burnt carmel sweat. He's a sexy, earthy, naked god who walks around in cedar shoes and then fades from the palate with eloquence and grace, leaving you with a mouth full of soft, silky tannins and a lingering kiss of wet red fruit. 
Balance: That's wine integrity clinging to the sides of your glass. Soft tannins with no residual sugar to muck it up, but not so much acid that it makes your mouth dry and uncomfortable either. It's a beautiful thing.
Comments: If you can find it, buy it. You will be glad you did. Share in love and friendship, and you will be eternally blessed and happy.
Rating: 4 super star

Friday, March 18, 2011

ESTE Red Blend 08'

Naked Wine Review 69
Wine: ESTE, The 6 Grapes Wine, Red Blend- 47% Monastrell, 23% Tempranillo, 12% Syrah, 6% Garnacha, 6% Cabernet, 6% Merlot
Producer: Bodegas Alto Almanzora ESTE
Vintage: 08'
Region: Spain
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 3/12/11
Place tasted: I was wondering around Valhalla trying to find a shoe store after having been slain in combat during 'the Battle on Sanity Hill'. There were no shoe stores in Valhalla, but I did find a day spa called 'Be Here, Now Here', where they pamper you with pedicures, new doo's, deep tissue massage, and glass after glass of ESTE, the 6 Grapes Wine; after all, dying in battle can take a lot out of you. 
Serve with: Crema de Cabrales on toast points; fed to me by a nicely chiseled and dare I say, firm, naked man. They really spoil you at the 'Be Here, Now Here'.
Appearance: Garnet with deep orange reflections.
On the snoot: Mixed berries mingling with anise; and maybe just a hint of cardboard splashed with ether. It's nice.
Taste: Heavy blackberry on impact followed by notes of licorice spice and cracked pepper that mingle with tannins so cute and fuzzy, ya just wanna reach into the glass and pet em'. On the finish is the lingering image of a cat licking a raspberry. I quite liked it. 
Balance: Nicely balanced. Dances light on her feet while maintaining firm focus and integrity. 
Comments: Visualize Ballard Baby, I'm coming home to the Pugetopolis! Can't wait to be part of the puddle splashing, road rage hissing, bone dry cappuccino drinking, neurotic freak show team that I like to call 'my happy place'. I've missed you guys. I'm hoping to run into me while I'm there as well. I'm so excited. I hope I haven't gained weight.
By the by, the animal on the label, is a pregnant mare. I knew you were all wondering. 
Rating: 3.6 stars

Friday, March 4, 2011

Goats do Roam Red 08'

Naked Wine Review 68
Wine: Red Blend-61% Syrah, 14% Cinsault, 13% Mourvedre, Grenache 8%, Carignan 4%
Producer: Goats do Roam
Vintage: 08'
Region: South Africa
Price: 9.00
Date tasted: 3/1/11
Place tasted: In a hot jetted bathtub surrounded by bubbles, candles, shampoo, face wash, body wash, scrubby gloves, sea salt, the pink man, bottled water, lemon wedges, a glass glowing red with wine, crystals.....and NO SPOON! There is no spoon; remember? Sometimes you have to remind yourself. If you don't know what I'm talking about, watch The Matrix again. 
Serve with: Bobotie (pronounced ba-boor-tea) is a South African lamb dish usually served with yellow rice an chutney and it is wonderful with this wine. It's a good wine for many foods with strong character. Can handle a bit of spice just fine. May overpower foods of a more delicate nature such as seafood and other fish. Excellent with red meat; and of course, dark Posh Chocolate.
Appearance: of violet petals, viewed through a giant glowing ruby orb. 
On the snoot: Fig, tar, and the rare Suider-Paarl Snoot Fruit, which is quite similar to black cherry.
Taste: Blackberry and licorice spice open up into a full round naked cherry midsection that gently offers silky tannins up to the palate before giving way to a lingering cotton candy, tobacco & cedar finish.  
Balance: She's so well balanced, she practically levitates.
Comments: The life of a wine witch can be very trying sometimes. It doesn't matter, I take the red pill anyway; not the blue one. Always take the red pill! If you don't know what I'm talking about, sit back with a glass of Goats do Roam, and watch The Matrix. Now don't make me tell you again. Truth is my identity, Sat Nam. 

Rating: 3.4 stars